The Certain Uncertainty of Death

Something I’ve noticed recently is how quickly time is moving for me. It feels like I blink and a month has gone, the days go fast and the seasons change quicker than I realise. I’m barely used to winter and it already feels like spring is on its way. Thinking about this made me realise some things I’d like to share. Some random thoughts about why we fear death so much and how we can recognise this in ourselves and other people.

One aspect of the modern world I find amazing is how long we all expect to live. People who die at 70 are considered to die young, whereas a several decades ago that would have been an achievement. Medicine progresses to cure more and more, so it feels like we’d only be happy to die of old age at 110 in our sleep. Sadly, very few of us will actually experience that and the truth of the matter is that we could die at any age. It’s the uncertain certainty, death will happen but rarely can we be sure of how and when until time is running out.

In this sense, the modern world prepares us to die at a ripe old age. We are advised to invest in pensions pots and plan for our retirements even though the pension age gets higher and higher. The world expects to live for a longer and longer time each year. This can only add to the sense of being robbed of this liberty when somebody dies young. I’ve noticed a large number of people dying in their 40s for example, for a range of reasons or illnesses. This is only about ten years older than I am now but the prospect of only having ten years remaining seems grossly unfair. Yet it could happen.

Once the fear of this creeps in, it’s hard to shift that thought and appreciate life in the way we think we should. The contradiction of living each day like it’s your last but saving money because you’ll grow old is around us everywhere. You can see in the same magazine two different articles about why we need to eat a healthier diet and then later on why we should just eat the damn cupcake. In a practical sense, we somehow have to accept that life is finite and varied in length, but in reality this is not a thought that comes easy. I remember learning once something like that a thousand years ago living past 35 could be deemed old age. These things change and develop through time and I wonder if their thoughts would have been any different or the same just on a much shorter timescale. Religion has had and does have a lot to say on accepting your time and the will of higher beings, but I think in a modern world where people rely less and less on religion we will of course question these things instead.

I do hope that this is thought provoking and not depressing as it could be interpreted. What I am trying to emphasise is that fearing something unknown will ultimately not lead to any good. Learning to accept the unknown and know it exists is key, and by understanding that you can see through the fear to some extent. I’m not saying that I am not afraid of death, or that I am not sad when those around me die. It doesn’t make grief or bereavement necessarily any easier, but it does make living with the inevitability of death a lot easier.

MG x